Coping with/ Overcoming stress

Without going into too much detail of my own crazy, due to a therapy program I’m currently undertaking I have come across progressive muscle relaxation.
I use the 10 minute 33 second YouTube guide called Progressive Muscle Relaxation Meditation (posted by UNH Health Service).
I’ve been far too close-minded in the past about some of these things, and am finding doing this numerous times a week (I should do it everyday!) is really calming me down, and helping my stress level.
I do it as part of a bedtime routine.
I’m also trying to slot a few “worry time”s into my week – Again something I think sounds wanky, but actually has research behind it in terms of reducing distress and stress…Googling it will probably give a better description and methodology than I could explain so I might suggest that.
If you’re like me, I’m open to any and all suggestions, as a sort of “I’ll give anything a go” as when you’re stressed out of your mind you’ve got nothing to lose.
Loved reading everyone’s contributions here. It’s such a lovely community x

Hi Stephanie 2494

How are things going for you now? It is about 4 months since you started this thread. I am hoping that you were able to use some of these ideas above as well as find some other supports for yourself.

🙂

Oh Stephanie! I am so sorry you are going through this right now!
When I first was transferred to cairns I got so stressed that I felt depressed, didn’t want to go anywhere and I felt overwhelmed . and it really took me a whole year to come out of it. I knew no one and my family felt so far away. It really took me a long time to feel like I belonged here.. If that makes sense. Now I love it but it really took time! I really think what helped for me was really getting true to myself and starting back at the real basics. I just would take myself to the beach and just sit and breathe. Also talking… I made myself call people .. And I don’t even like talking on the phone haha. Do little things each day to make yourself feel connected again. Also allow yourself time… Because this is a very normal thing to go through. Remember you aren’t alone. It’s hard because people don’t talk about things like this and I think people need to. Just know we are all here for you. Xx start today… Go to a place that makes you feel at ease and happy and just feel everything around you. Breathe and listen. Xxx big hugs to you! I’m so glad you had the courage to talk about it! That’s really something to feel good about.

Hey Steph,

I completely understand, I’m in Year 12 this year! I would suggest yoga, meditation, or just simply breathing in and out slowly when things get rough. Take some time to just relax by lying down, reading, or doing something you love! Xx

Thanks everyone for the wonderful advice :). I feel overwhelmed with the support. I will be looking into these ideas and focusing on implementing changes/strategies gradually within my life.

I feel like stress is such a prominent thing in society these days, and it can definitely have a terrible impact upon so many aspects of life.

Petal, thank you so much for finding the thread I wanted but couldn’t find. I’ve just made a post there so that it will come back onto latest. Also adding this here because your post is a fair way up now, thanks to our gorgeous members joining in this discussion.

Stephanie, I’m really sorry to hear about what you’ve been going through. As someone who does stress easily (part & parcel of the anxiety situation I mentioned above), I know I need to have a grip on things, otherwise my mind spirals out of control & I can easily fall into an anxiety attack.

saltine mentioned just about everything I was going to mention, but I’ll still offer my 2c anyway. I usually do a combination of all of these:

• Exercise. I’m not saying join the gym & start lifting weights, but I find that a nice walk sometimes helps me when I’m stressed or have the blues. I’ve been going for a long walk on & off when I get up of a morning recently & it starts me on a good note for the day.

• Write it out. Another thing I mentioned in that post above. If you journal already, then that’s a good place to go. If you don’t journal already, then start!

• Talk it over with someone you trust. For me, that’s my parents (usually my Mum, who always knows when something’s up….I have no poker face & I can’t bottle stuff up for too long, or else I explode or melt down); but for you it could be a sibling or a friend or someone else you know. Or it could be us ladies! Trust me, the ladies of BH are some of the most caring, lovely, supportive people I’ve never physically met (although I’d love to).

• Download a meditation app & use that to chill out. I’ve got the Calm app on my phone & whilst I don’t use all the bells & whistles that comes with it, I find even just playing some of the sounds/music through my earphones whilst lying down helps. Again, it’s not always effective (my mind can wander sometimes), but it can be beneficial.

I hope you can take something from all the advice we’ve given & I hope you get on top of stress very soon.

I have struggled with stress in the past and these are things I do now on a regular basis to keep it at a normal level.

1. Yoga. Specifically yin or restorative yoga in which you hold a pose for 3-5 minutes and really focus on your breathing. I go to a class because I prefer to have a real person guiding me and I enjoy doing it within a group environment.

2. Meditation. This is so simple but also requires a lot of focus. I use guided youtube videos before bed to help me fall asleep if I have worries on my mind.

3. Deep breathing. Super simple and super, super effective. If your stress spirals into panic it’s easy to “forget” to breathe properly. Long, deep inhalations and long deep exhalations really help to calm you down in the moment. Do the best you can do, any effort is a good step towards progress. A nice trick is to place your hands on your belly with your middle fingers touching then inhaling to the point where you fingers no longer touch – that is an adequate deep breath. Closing your eyes is also nice.

4. Writing. Sometimes it helps to write down your thoughts, you may use it privately or share it with someone you trust. Writing down psychically with a pen and paper allows you time to process your thoughts and over time you may notice patterns.

5. Sleep. Good quality sleep is vital to controlling stress and often when we are most stressed it is the most difficult to attain a restful sleep on a regular basis. This is where you must take responsibility for good sleep hygiene, to the best of your ability. If you are someone who uses their phone or any other form of technology in bed, stop right now. Leave your phone, on silent, out of your sleeping area, unless you are oncall for work. If you need an alarm for the mornings, buy a separate alarm clock. Use an eye pillow or mask to help you drift off, you can make these or purchase.

6. Diet. Nourish your body to the best standard you can. It doesn’t need to be expensive. You don’t need superfoods. Just a basic wholesome wholefood diet is ideal. Moderation is key here.

7. Psychologist. 6 months is getting to a long term problem and I recommend you see a GP to discuss a mental health care plan to enable you to see a psychologist for free. It can be really beneficial to talk things out in a completely confidential manner.

8. Organising. Bit by bit, tackle an area of your life that needs structure. Whether it’s periodically cleaning out your wardrobe, pantry, bathroom, paperwork pile. Reducing the items that you no longer need or serve you can be incredibly freeing. A simpler environment does wonders for the mind.

9. Nature. Get out amongst nature as often as possible, ideally daily. Fresh air is wonderful, even if you can only manage to open the window. You’ll hopefully hear some birds chirping away.

10. People. Take a look at who is in your life. Do they deserve to be there? If you have toxic relationships in your life the best solution is the end them. Be it a partner, friend or family member. This is the most difficult aspect being that humans are very social and we are inter-dependent on one another. Learn where you investment lies and never forget to invest in yourself.

11. Hobbies. You must do things you enjoy, or if things are particularly bad you need to do things to distract yourself (at the peak end). Look for tactile things (playdoh), things that make you use your brain other than worrying (puzzle, sudoku). Have a range of activities you can try to help in different situations.

12. Music. Avoid heavy/angry/sad songs. This is my favourite song for relaxation https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CcsUYu0PVxY

13. Routine. It’s important to stick to some sort of routine while life is testing you. Even if it seems pointless, try to get out of bed the same time, have a plan for the day – even if it’s just “I’m going to have a shower first, then breakfast, then check the mail”, etc.

There’s some excellent advice given in this thread. It’s always important to look at what is causing the stress and see if there is something practical that can be done to eliminate or lessen it. Often people tie themselves in knots over things that by reaching out for help or assistance could be solved.

I would also add making sure you spend time with positive friends. Often when you are stressed it feels like you have too much happening to socialise, but being with friends gives you an opportunity to put things in perspective, put your mind to other things and can brighten your mood.

It can sometimes help to compartmentalise the stress – identify where it is coming from eg work and make an effort not to let it affect other areas of your life.

I find gym classes helpful (even though I don’t really like exercise) as you need to focus on what you are doing and what the instructor is saying and your mind doesn’t have the chance to focus on the stress. This can be enough to break the cycle of stress for the day, especially when the endorphins kick in. Gym classes may not be your thing, but the key is finding something you enjoy that distracts your mind and acts as a bit of a circuit breaker.

Wishing you all the best.

Hi Stephanie,

The last 5 or so years years have been super stressful for me so here are a few of my stress busters. They might sound a bit wacky but give them a try….

Exercise obviously
10 minutes of “me” time every day, no interruptions a trash mag and a cup of tea
Talking to someone just to get it off your chest
And finally and possibly the wackiest a stress relief meditation app you put on when you go to bed (doesn’t matter if you fall asleep) I swear by the last one.