We all know that vibrators are basically God’s gift to women. They get you where you need to go – fast – and they do it well. The sexual wellness market is flooded with so many top-notch sex toys, but sometimes it’s nice to get back to basics.
Enter: the lost art of masturbating without a vibrator.
Maybe you’ve been hitting the wand too hard and you need a little vibe detox. Maybe your beloved Rabbit is in its death throes. Maybe you need a non-buzzy option out of respect for your roommates. Maybe ‘sex toys’ are below ‘food’ in this month’s budget (although you can snag yourself a sex toy for under $20…). We get it.
Masturbating without a vibrator is a great way to explore what feels good to you and to retrain your body to respond to different, subtler sensations. Being more responsive can translate into easier orgasms when you are with another human again. And besides, the health benefits of orgasms are reason enough to set aside a little self-care each week (or even day).
So whether you are new to masturbating overall or have been hitting it for a while, let this be your guide to putting your hand to good use.
How to masturbate without a vibrator
1. The Faux F*ck
Miss the feeling of penetration? A pillow will be your self-pleasure bestie. Squat over the pillow with one finger inside your vagina and the other hand stimulating your clit. You can thrust against your finger, tap gently on the upper wall of your vagina, or press hard in the same spot. Take your time – you’ve got plenty.
2. The V Stroke
If clitoral stimulation is your thing, lube up your index and middle fingers, placing one on each side of your clit. Slide your fingers up and down on either side of your clit. Simple as that. If you want to amp it up, press a finger just above the entrance to your vagina and tap or rub gently.
3. Mirror Selfie
It can be surprisingly hot to watch yourself in the heat of the moment. Pull a chair up to a mirror (lock the door first, obviously) and watch yourself as you stroke your body. Start slow and tease yourself a little. Pinch your nipples and see what happens. Drizzle some lube on your belly and watch it trickle between your legs. Damn, girl, you look good.
4. Sticky Fingers
Go back to basics and start by gently tapping your clit. You don’t need lube for this one – a little bit of tackiness is your friend here. It may not do it for you right away, but keep at it, teasing yourself with starts and stops. Advanced level: put a dollop of lube on your clit and slowly swirl a finger around it. Don’t shift to more vigorous strokes, even if you really, really want to (and you likely will) – your orgasm will unfold in a surprisingly powerful series of waves.
5. The Bath Bomb
If you have not had sex in (or with) water, you’re missing out. And if you’re not blessed with a detachable showerhead, you can get down with the regular old faucet. Slide yourself down so your V is angled directly under the stream (just test the water temp first!). Adjust the water pressure to your liking. Actual bath bomb optional.
6. The Threesome for One
If you’re down for a bit of multitasking, this one’s for you. Use one hand to do whatever makes your clit happy. Use the other to curl your index finger up against the upper wall of your vagina and, if you’re down to try it, your fully lubed pinkie up your bum. Pro tip: If your hand gets crampy, a butt plug works wonders!
7. The Convertible
Straddle a pillow, fill your hand with a long-lasting lube, then run your fingers up and down your vulva, rubbing it in circles. Lower yourself and hump your slippery hand. Do you like the humping? The rubbing? Mix and match? This is valuable intel that will not only get you off but can also make sex with another person that much better too. Knowledge is power!
8. The Burlesque Ban
Most women cannot have an orgasm with penetration alone, but penetration can make an orgasm feel deeper and last longer. Invest in a dildo, ready to serve you whenever you please. Stick it to the seat of a chair, plop on down Cabaret-style, and ride it while stroking your clit. You can thank us later…
Main image credit: @vellabioscience
Have you tried any of these self-satisfying moves, or do you prefer a vibrator?
Lots and lots of information and a good topic to be open about.certainly no shame in this.
The shower head/water tap is one I would not have thought of.
no completely new idea
Would never have considered the water tap idea at all
So many to try!
Wow this article has so many specific tips. Love it.
Prefer men to do it to me lol
That too !!
Learnt so much from this article
Me too -I grew up with a really shy Mum and did not learn anything from her so my eyes are still open to hear new facts.
I had not thought of the majority of these options
Good to be in tune with your own body
Good tips for the girls.
Lots of ways here
It’s good to see frank articles like this.
This is a great information no one talk. Thanks for sharing.
Well written article
Actually this is a good article especially for the young girls who are too scared to ask. My mum never told me anything (back in the olden days :-P) but I learnt from books I read. There was an article of some woman that wrote about how to make yourself happy. I am sure I have it somewhere or maybe I don’t now but it was such a good read.
Interesting article. Curious about the shower head. Is that safe?
very informative